How not to let fears ruin our reality

June 24, 2020

Summary: According to scientific research, in order to create a new future, it is necessary to create new neural connections in our brain. Some of these connections serve us, while others block us. We need to learn how to create resourceful neural connections and, as a result, a new desired future.



Good and bad neurons, what’s the difference?


Blocking neural connections do not allow us to advance through the ranks at work; to build harmonious relationships with parents, spouses, and children; to do what we love to do or to feel self-reliant. Unconsciously following those patterns of behavior that are caused by blocking neural connections, we deprive ourselves of lightness, harmony and happiness. What we do instead, - we often live in fear.


The good news is that you can learn to actively direct your brain and purposefully create relationships that help to become happier, healthier, more joyful, and more successful.



How real are our fears?


Often fears arise subconsciously, they block us, without having a real basis.


Fears are nothing else but our beliefs. The same neural connections participate in their formation. It is necessary to break the old neural connections. We can do this by sorting out the beliefs that lead to fears. Once this is done, we can form new neural connections.


The list of classic beliefs that feed our fears are well known:


- I am stupid

- I am not worthy / I don’t deserve it

- I'm a bad mother / father

- I am a failure 

- I am useless

- I am not valued / appreciated

- I'm a loser

- Society doesn't accept me

- Everybody around irritates me

- They don't notice me

- Money is evil

- I don’t need money 

- Relaxation is procrastination

- I am going to fail 

- All people around me are fools

- I can only feel worthy if I achieve something 

- Talking to people is a waste of time


We unconsciously use such mindsets daily. And they greatly affect our interactions with the outside world and the quality of our achievements. At the same time, they can tell a lot about our blocking neural connections.


One of the examples is a businessman or a leader with the mindset “All people around me are fools”. No wonder such a person cannot find skilled employees and create a dream team. In fact, such a leader is afraid to look ignorant and stupid, fearing that someone will be smarter (unconscious avoidance).


Another, a somewhat ironic, example is a mindset “No money”. A person who has such a mindset will never be able to earn enough money. Self-proficiency turns on: every day we convince ourselves of this and find various conformations. As a result, it turns out that way.


On the other hand, if a person has the “the world is full of opportunities” attitude, then their consciousness sees these opportunities. Such people move with ease through their lives and to their goals.



Investing in our well-being is the best way to change the tide


Quite often people get into a vicious circle: poor health, divorce, financial loss, bankruptcy, dismissal, etc. In order not to get into such a situation, we might need to notice worrying symptoms in time. Ideally we shouldn’t let the situation get out of control. The goal is to prevent or stop the domino effect. The best way to assure that we lose our health, relationships, money or property is to take time for self reflection and invest in ourselves ideally in the early states and before it is too late.


Reflection on blocking beliefs is liberating. It is important to remember that everything can be removed, eliminated, or modified. As a result, we reach the elimination of negative situations, stop the disaster and can improve the quality of life. Besides, we find the inner peace, which is so valuable and necessary for maintaining health, personal and professional growth.


We are convinced that every person has a resource and a potential. Everyone deserves the best. In order to reinforce and multiply our success, we need to pay attention to the early “bells” of recurring situations that bother us and build a new development path.



In Gross Leadership we work with companies and individuals who are keen to turn any challenging situation into a new opportunity. Our clients come from such well-known companies as Credit Suisse, UBS, Novartis, Nestlé, GSK, IKEA, Swiss Re, ETH Zurich and others. 


We can help and are happy to see you among our clients! 


You can contact us via our website and discuss our potential cooperation.


And you, would you agree that it is in our power to turn the tides, transforming challenging situations and our fears into new opportunities and career success?


“All the world’s a stage,


And all the men and women merely players…”


(W. Shakespeare, As You Like It)


We believe that each and every one of us is not only a leading actor but first and foremost a writer of our own destiny. Overwhelmed by life events, we may unintentionally forget that we are the sole playwrights of our own lives. We may even unwittingly drop or lose the thread of our unfolding life story. Then, we start questioning ourselves and let others do the writing for us. Doesn’t this happen to all of us occasionally? The best thing we can do is to resume the leadership as soon as we can: only we should write the play of our life!  


With the renewed confidence and new skills, we design new perspectives. Coaching and training are the best instruments we use to achieve this goal.

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